Sermon on the Mount

The priest in a small Irish village was very fond of the chickens he kept in the hen house, out the back of the parish house. He had a cock rooster and about ten hens.

One Saturday night the cock rooster was missing and as that was the time he suspected cock fights occurred in the village he decided to do something about it at church the next morning. At Mass, he asked the congregation, "Has anybody got a cock?" All the men stood up.

"No no" he said. "That wasn't what I meant. Has anybody seen a cock?" All the women stood up.

"No no" he said. "That wasn't what I meant. Has anybody seen a cock that doesn't belong to them." Half the women stood up.

"No no" he said "That wasn't what I meant either. Has anybody seen my cock? All the choirboys stood up!